Surrender
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Checking on Mom via the Ring cameras is heart-breaking. Yet, I had the fleeting remembrance last night of my therapist’s perspective: “This is her death. You cannot change it. You can only keep vigil with her.” Mom is not in pain and she is in her home. Yet, I feel pulled in many directions most…
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Hello March! The sun streaming in my kitchen window is fierce. The warmth I feel is a beautiful thing. Thinking about how I get to help some women in Recovery…it’s a real privilege, and I have been developing patience with them as with Self in the process. I can move away from frustration towards compassion…
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I have been reminded [often] lately that I need help. Help only a Power greater than myself can provide. When I resist asking; when I choose to ruminate, and go on and on about what I see or what I think I see–what I think I know or don’t know–no goodness can get through. There…
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No matter the circumstances, settling in after traveling can be rough. It’s been a somewhat stressful two weeks for Mom; for me. The health system is in the toilet by and large, and home health is no exception. The devil is in the details, and try as I may to manage a schedule for the…
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Tameka and I took mom to Live! casino yesterday. We also had the bonus of meeting up with Roe G. We were out for a couple of hours. I gave the casino my money and mission was accomplished: Mom got out in the world. Tameka continues to settle in beyond all my hopes. My assignment…
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I remain amazed and grateful at the consistency and power that writing brings into my Spirit. “Now” is okay. I am here “now.” We found an aid that Mom can tolerate. She’s quite good. She can engage Mom where Mom is now. I do recognize that I have never had to do any of this…
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Thank you Higher Power. I have experienced grace: blessings that were given to me that I did not deserve. And I have experienced mercy: consequences withheld that were absolutely what I “bought” through my actions and inactions. I have never before felt this true a desire to choose your will over mine. I have never…
Faith & Roses 